Saturday, 23 September 2017

I Need a Husband, Fast

Every woman needs a husband, preferably, an ideal one. A good husband is the dream of every woman – the ultimate desire and expectation. It is noted that an ideal companion is not easy to come by. To get an ideal husband, the one with what a woman will live joyfully till good old age, something serious must be done. I mean, a serious commitment, such as marriage, requires preparation.

In preparing for marriage, a woman must be ready to go extra miles to have her way. There are some common beliefs men have about women, and any woman that is ready for marriage must try as much to live above them. This is important so as to satisfy her desire for an ideal husband. Here are seven of the most common beliefs that men have about women:

1. Women Are Never Satisfied – Every woman needs a husband that cares – who is highly responsible, and who can stand as the head of the family – a husband who is able to lead successfully and tenderly, such that the family members will recognize his Position, respect and honor him and care for one another unreservedly. This is not asking for too much. Moreover, a good woman should expect that her husband should:

• Be a partner indeed and gainfully employed (2 Thessalonians 3: 7-10).
• Be loving and caring (Genesis 24:67; Ephesians 5:25; 1 Corinthians 13: 1-13).
• Be wise in communication (Proverbs 15: 2, 4).
• Be reliable, realistic and considerate (Ephesians 4:32)
• Be ready to please her in all things (1 Corinthians 7: 34b).
• Be able to patiently study her conduct, lifestyle, habits and make adjustments where necessary (Ephesians 4: 2).
• Be studious and knowledgeable (2 Timothy 2:15).
• Be diligent and hardworking, not lazy (Proverbs 10: 4).
• Be cheerful, not moody (Philippians 4: 4).
• Be a generous giver, sometimes giving her surprise gifts (Proverbs 11:25).
• Be prayerful, waiting on the Lord, respecting and honoring God and leading other members of the family in doing the same (Romans 12:11; Genesis 18: 17-19).
• Be ready at all times to defend and protect her dignity and personality in the presence of visitors, in-laws, friends and outsiders (1 John 3:16).
• Be appreciative of all her efforts. Learn to say nice things like "Thank you", "I appreciate you", "God bless you", etc (Colossians 3:15).
• Be committed and faithful to the marriage vows for life, leaving and cleaving to his wife only (Genesis 2: 21-24; Proverbs 5: 15-18).
• Be available to hear her discussions (James 1:19).
• Be patient with her even when she offends (2 Timothy 2: 4).
• Be filled with forgiving spirit and not retaliating or revengeful (Romans 12:21).
• Be holy in conscience (Job 31: 1).

Because women are always looking for ways to make things better, men easily misunderstand their actions and contributions to mean over-demanding. I have once been counseled by some season couples not to take my wife's suggestions as complaints or criticisms, rather, as her desire to make our marriage relationship or situation the best that it can be. In any case, a woman's contribution in the home is highly misunderstood. Any woman looking for a husband should bear in mind that men have reservations in matters that concern women and as a result must try to adjust herself to conquer these ugly notions about them.

2. Women Are Not Naturally Dependent – Most men believe that a strong, confident woman does not need a man to take care of her, yet the truth remains that women are made to complete the men. A man that is alone is in hell fire. That is never the will of God. When God saw Adam, who lived without a woman for a certain period, God exclaimed, "It is not good for man to be alone". To get complete, a man needs a woman, and vice versa. For a woman to really fit into the home as a wife, she needs a husband who can easily take decision for the family because he is knowledgeable both in spiritual and secular affairs. He knows the best decision to take on behalf of the family that will really benefit his wife, children and self. The kind of husband the woman wants is one who will not abdicate his responsibilities and expect his wife to play the role of the husband. Even if a woman can fix things around the house or change the oil in her car, she will still ask for the husband's help to make her feel his strength, support and protection. She is naturally made to depend on you, as a husband!

3. Women Only Want To Control Men – Everyone loves to be taken care of and to feel needed. Whenever a woman needs to express her love, it looks more like she wants to take over the control of the man. Women are better lovers, and so try to express their love without reservation. When a woman sees a man hurting, struggling or overwhelmed, her goal is to help, not to control. Men should allow their wives to give them a helping hand, because that is what they need in times of crisis. This goes a long way to tell the woman who is looking for a husband that her actions, even those with the best of intentions, would be misunderstood, but a woman who is really informed and well matured in mind, will conquer and have a good Home at the end.

4. Women Require A Lot To Be Kept In The Bond Of Marriage – I have often heard it often that keeping a woman as a wife requires a lot of hard work, time and money. Well, it is proper to know that a serious relationship requires time and effort to cultivate. If you do not give attention to the most important thing in your life, who will? At least, as a husband your wife should be able to trust you in matters that pertain to leadership and care-giving.

She should be satisfied with your duty as a husband, and expects that you be:

• Understanding in conversation and discreet in correction (Proverbs 15:23).
• Dependable in contributing to family needs (1Timothy 5: 8).
• Genuinely interested in her spiritual, physical, health and emotional (3 John 1: 2)
• Humble enough to admit your faults and apologize when necessary (James 5:16).

With all these qualities fulfilled in you, as a husband, the wife will be happy and great will be the joy in the family. Friend, taking care of your wife should not be seen as a burden, because your investments on her will be reciprocated, sooner or later. What you do to your wife today is exactly what you reap from her tomorrow!

5. Women Are Easily Deceived – Women can be deceived easily because they look up to the men as leaders, and being good followers, they are led into accepting some lies from men. However, not all women can believe everything from men. Some women are extremely capable of picking up moods and attitudes and can easily read body language and facial expressions. Some men may think that they have gotten away with some great lies, yet the women are either letting the lies slide because they want to keep the peace, or they are lying to themselves because they are afraid of the truth.

6. Women Are Jealous And Possessive – Men, in most cases, see jealousy and possessiveness as part of being a woman. We should try to understand women as people who are truly protective of what belongs to them. They protect the things they value, especially when it comes to relationships. Acting in such a manner does not mean that they do not trust the men; Rather, they are simply guarding the relationship. As a husband, every man is too precious to his wife, who would not like to allow anything bad to happen. In seeking for a man to marry, women should watch this ugly belief about women in men, and try to live above it.

7. Women Are Emotional – Women do not hide their feelings. They articulate what's going on in their minds. There's nothing wrong with emotions – we all have them. Being in touch with their emotions causes women to be sensitive and caring, and that's why men love them! As a women looking forward to get married to a man, try to understand that men push a lot of things too far. Your good intention might as well become a hidden to your family, one day. Follow events gradually as they unfold, but in all things, trust in God.


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